January 14, 2011

I’m shaking. I’m really shaking. I usually don’t get all shaky and nauseous – for anything. Oh wait, yes, when I gave my testimony. Yikes! Was a shaky then. And man, I’m so nervous now!

I just submitted my entry in the Women of Faith writing contest. I found myself staring at my email inbox waiting for a reply to shout something like, ‘Wow! That was the best submission I ever read!’ I feel like the little boy in A Christmas Story, you know, the scene when he gives his teacher the essay he worked so hard on but it really wasn’t that great. In his mind he drifts to imagining his teacher and classmates singing his praises… and then reality sets in and he’s standing there with that stupid grin. Oh that is so me right now!!! Ok, it’s alright. I can wait until March to get a reply. Right?

The last blog I wrote I sounded like a spoiled little girl who was mad because someone else got a pink pony for her birthday. Trust, that didn’t last too long. God snapped his fingers and said, ‘Get with it!’ And so I did. The reality is I find my purpose in life in writing this book. Oh so many moments where my heart was so full ideas, thoughts, words, Scripture – I had to write or else I would burst! And so I did. What a great feeling to work on something I am so passionate about. That fire in my belly just got a little bigger. I wonder what God will do with the pages. Hopefully touch the lives of so many people that are in search for something; and they will realize they are in search for God.

During my devotional today, I landed on the Beatitudes. Strange how that happened. But anyway, I realized the blessings Jesus talks about are the result of our authentic actions of being poor in spirit, mourning, meek and humbled, mercy and grace, pure in heart, sprinkling peace in every thought and deed. It’s through these life circumstances that we are blessed because we can experience God. Man, God is deep! Preach it Jesus!

I’m much calmer now. Time to clean my house. Thanks for listening.

Anxious,
Me.